I’m so happy to be featured in the upcoming (summer) issue of Bella Grace. Do you know this magazine? If you dream of reading in a lavender bath—this is the magazine you’d want to have with you. It is so gorgeously designed and inspiring and alive but also so very quiet. Reading it you feel your breathing slow down, your attention come to the present moment. You don’t think about all the things you should be doing, you don’t wonder “What else?” is out there or going on or being talked about and Liked and re-Tweeted at this moment. You feel totally content where you are. The piece they published of mine was called “Imagine Tonight” but they’ve renamed it simply, “Imagine.” It was inspired by reading the magazine and reconnecting to how much I loved evenings spent at home by myself but still in the real world.
Hope you are able to spend some time there tonight.
Every week I commit to hammering out a few blog posts so I have them ready to go on my days, Tuesday and Thursday. Between errands, time sensitive to dos, follow-ups, and other things, my lofty aspirations of writing a blog come crashing down. It’s the one unchecked item on my list, circled, underlined, and starred multiple times over, but never fully complete.
Laundry – done; make soup – done; pay bills – done; yoga class – done; blog – blank.
How do I follow through and bring this lofty aspiration into reality. It takes a degree of self-discipline. Is it better time management? Am I putting of writing my blog? We are reaching a midpoint. The freshness and newness of it was good. Maintaining the commitment of writing two times a week was never easy, but I was committed and more importantly I didn’t want to let Rachel or myself down. Plus, I was really proud to be out there, opening myself up, which isn’t me at all. Work overwhelmed me in January causing me to run out of steam.
And now I’ve been aiming to write once a week. It’s a lot like doing yoga or going to the gym – a muscle you have to exercise. So, where is my motivation, my discipline? At work, we do a job because we’re responsible for it. I do yoga – honestly – I thought about this one – because I pay a monthly fee to the studio and want my money’s worth. It’s the best way to keep me accountable; otherwise I find an excuse or sit at my desk and do more work. Same thing with going to physical therapy.
After working out or going to yoga, I always feel 100% better. When writing a blog post. I do feel a sense of satisfaction, especially when I read it over and think, “Hey, this is decent.”
So, feeling good is an outcome and I do enjoy the process. That’s the end and the middle. It’s the start and step before I start that’s really hard for me. Perhaps my goal is too high. Instead, I will aim to write one blog over the weekend and start with baby steps. Let’s see what happens…
Overthinking is a shackle. If I do X, then Y. Saying this will result in that. What if scenario A, B and on and on to Z? By the time you get to Z, you will have completely talked yourself out of the thing you were doing.
As children, we are fearless, playful and curious. Over time, a parent slaps our hand when we reach for something, a teacher says we didn’t color in between the lines properly, a coach or teammate says we can’t do it that way and pretty soon we are programmed to try to just figure out what others want and please them.
Writing is a creative process. Overthinking obstructs the process of letting an idea come to life. Once where there were thoughts and ideas flowing freely, the shackle presses down on your brain and holds the creativity back like a vice. It boils down to just going for it and not second-guessing yourself, in other words, it comes down to confidence.
Lately, I’ve become more self aware of how my desire to please takes over my confidence. My fear of being or doing something wrong freezes me dead in my tracks.
What’s the cure?
Being highly aware of the behaviors and realizing when I’m doing it is a start. And then when it starts, I tell myself, “Stop overthinking, do it.” Or in the case of writing, personal or professional, “Don’t think, just write.”