It’s taken me several decades, but I’ve finally cancelled my membership to the Perfectionist Club. All these years, starting with school and now work, I have always put this immense pressure on myself to be perfect. Whatever I’m doing, whether it was a paper, a test and then later on something for work, I’d say to myself, “It has to be perfect,” as if the pressure and stress of the situation wasn’t already enough, saying that to myself only magnified the intensity of the situation. Suffice it to say, it did not make anything easier or better, it probably only made things worse.
I always thought having that perfectionist mindset was necessary to get the work done and do it well. Like, if somehow I didn’t think that way, I wouldn’t do well or be motivated to do well. Putting that pressure on myself became the norm, to the point where I was afraid that I’d not be successful if I didn’t act that way. Essentially, in my opinion, I formed a bad habit.
So, why now? I think yoga and how it has saved me in really desperate or challenging times in my life has a lot to do with it. Being older, my health and my body can’t take the stress anymore. And I’m starting to learn that I put my all in and work really hard, regardless of the pressure I put on myself. The perfection doesn’t do anything and isn’t needed. It just leads to overthinking and prevents me from moving forward.
-Kajal
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